Life is so mysterious.
It is filled with drops of exquisite beauty and barbed moments of pain.
Sometimes there are signs in the mud that something is coming or has been there... waiting to bring chaos.
There are trails that are slippery and steep and we don't know if we should try to use them.
We get caught in our lives and we feel that we are the only ones who are dealing with this pain and confusion.
We don't understand how others could live their lives as if everything is all right.
We isolate ourselves in our houses...
And fear the "wild river" that we can't seem to contain,
where life moves swiftly over stones unseen.
We see the evidence before us.
Plain truth... without thought.
It's not here.... on a old sign post,
fighting the possibility that something is coming... bringing suffering with it... trying to protect ourselves from what hasn't happen yet.
But it might be here...
Or here... in the grateful eyes of animals... and friends, and relatives.
And even here...
Because life is everything and each being has an assignment that we need not interfere with.
So I will try to let go of tomorrow and busy myself with the moment at hand.
My first resolution of the year:
Life is an impermanent experience that I will try to accept and understand, but also try to see without being afraid.... without fighting or misunderstanding the experience.
I love this analogy... ( from "It's Easier Than You Think" by S. Boorstein)
The Familiar image is a children's cartoon character, like Daffy Duck, walking along freely and suddenly stepping into taffy. In a hasty, awkward attempt to extricate himself, he might fall forward and backward and eventually be totally stuck in the taffy. Even children see a better solution.
The best solution would be the nonalarmed recognition, " This is taffy. I didn't see it as I stepped into it, but I felt it after I got stuck. It's just taffy. the whole world is not made out of taffy. what would be a wise thing for me to do now?"
I will try to not get stuck in fearful things that haven't happen. I will try to be less frightened about what my mind creates.
Finally... a few more resolves:
I will not get trapped in my "story" and live my life with regret.
I will suffer. I wish I didn't have to, but I will.
I will be kinder to myself.
I will not cling to my own suffering.
I will start a journey of happiness at any moment of the day.
It's a beginning...